Unfortunate Glass Incident

Dear revered Financial Committee,

First and foremost, I extend my sincere gratitude for your understanding and the swift provision of funds after the unfortunate Medieval Castle War incident. The quote for repairing glass balustrades close to Melbourne was indeed hefty, but the new balustrade now stands resplendent, an ever-present reminder of the importance of metaphorical boundaries in our institutional shenanigans.

However, in what can only be described as a case of cruel irony, I find myself penning another appeal. This time, the cause of our collective headache is the infamous “Golly, Let’s Learn Physics!” event organised by none other than the indefatigable Abed ‘Pop-Culture-Vortex’ Nadu. You might recall him as the instigator of the Farscape revival marathon that lasted a full seven days and nights.

In his attempt to demonstrate the principles of gravity and momentum using an oversized bowling ball and makeshift lanes, the study area once again bore the brunt of our enthusiastic educational endeavours. The bowling ball, gaining momentum at an alarming rate, proved too much for the double-glazed windows.

To remedy this situation, I have contacted a few reputable commercial glazing companies based in Melbourne. They have provided competitive quotes to replace the shattered windows with more resistant materials, ensuring that any future physics demonstrations will not result in the same calamity.

I assure you, esteemed members of the committee, that I am taking steps to ensure such incidents become a thing of the past. A stricter vetting process for student-proposed activities is being drafted as we speak, with particular attention to activities involving heavy objects and the laws of physics.

I hope for your understanding and look forward to your prompt attention to this matter. With your continued support, I am confident we can turn these minor setbacks into major leaps forward in our mission to provide a unique and engaging learning environment.

Yours sincerely,

Greg Feltoff,
Dean, PebbleCreek Community College

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